Fools Gold in that bottle I held…Personified allibies

Just a shell walking in a lifeless form, a mannequin with barely a beating heart. Flat line waiting for the paddles, nothing could rattle my covetness for my numbness slathered

Dormant my personality lied, the zeal suppressed with alcoholics hallucinate hands. Reside in my own cell, an alcoholic hell. Sit in my own sin, wallow in my trademark venom

Never could pass the test, and any zest I may have had was laid to rest. Idolized the moisture of my enbrieated state. Filled with hate 

Fools gold in that bottle I held, meld into my skin. Personfied allibi, fake beyond each disguise. Lost with each sip, lucid goes as I got hosed

Swam with the sharks. Ravenous, blood thirsty. Needed that alcohol to occupy my soul. No holes, just bury all my secrets in my skin. Soak it up, let it be my end

It was my first thought upon waking the craving pulsating, and trampling my brain. It was the last thought upon laying my drunk head into a blackout state, death hovered 

This was the alcolohic me, numb me. Take away the pain for just one more moment. I hurt so bad inside. No where for God to reside. Hibernated, and bathed myself with my poison. My soul took cover, and demons hovered. Lurking in the night, I became as dark the tonic I drank. Rank with stank

Crippled by my own hands, hardened heart. Selfish, drowning in my own spite

Feeding off the juicy lies that came as day turned into night, and night turned into day. Spiced it up, made stuff up, my life was but a lie. Hiding in my bottle, this was the alcolohic me

No more hiding, no more numbing, no more running. For Jesus salvaged the wreckage I made of my life. Gave me hope, and took away my craving. He took my heart, and transplanted it at the cross. Carved my name, where His body hang in death for me on Calvary 

Layed the bottle down, and now I am unmasked and even somewhat vulnerable. For the love, laughter, and life I have now I would never trade it for a day of desperation lost. For I was off the grid, but now am found. In Him I abound. My masks are no more, my smile is real. In Jesus was my appeal….

Word Prompt: Spicy


4 years ago, He heard my plea on bended knee…

This is what 4 years without finding solace in a bottle of possibly a friend looks like, His grace is sufficient!! 

4 years ago this past Sunday, since I laid the bottle down in exchange for my life. In exchange for my crown. Jesus lifted me from the mire, took away my darkest desires. 

My very broken wings, could not even muster a flutter. I was beaten down, by the tonic that absorbed into every crevass of my body. 

My spirit, mind, and body dead. I drinked to live, and lived to drink. I often wonder with how close I was to the Lord how I let it consume me? 

Feed the flesh, and flesh wants more. Lost like a whore. Dark was all I could taste and see. No longer me. I had no plea, it was all about me!

Danced with the devil, and before I knew it he became my dance partner. Twirling me with what seemed the most melodic poise. White noise! Our steps so perfectly insync. I did not even blink. I was not scared, I was lost. Sinking sand!

Booze to numb and dumb, and to take away my pain. Yet I had nothing to gain. My skin rippled, and churned for when I could grab my next beer. Coat my throat, and deaden my heart. My world lost color, and was painted black. Pitch stained soul. Shacked up with alcohol. Snuggled it close, a love affair like no other. 

So 4 years ago this past Sunday I prayed a prayer that changed my life. In a instant Jesus took my barren soul, and made me whole again. He lifted my chin, and bound satans hands. Kept him far away for I was a very vulnerable newly sober in Christ me. He heard my plea. He healed me, and He gave me reason outside the tear stained bottle. No more full throttle. 

The last 4 years are more than just a celebration, I have been set free. My wings soar, and I don’t hide in polishing of a bottle. I lift my head, and my hands in gratefullness. Grace was poured out on me. My chains were broke, and I have been set free.

Barely surviving is no longer my purpose. I am now used to living above the surface. As Jesus walked on water in rescue of me. He heard my plea. 

I left the bottle at the baggage claim, and it had no name to be retrieved by me. 4 years ago the door was sealed to the room with shards of glass, that sliced me beyond recognition. Poured my blood, and ruined my life. Now I sit with a sober heart, and Jesus gave back my life. Took away the night. Healed my wounds, and stopped the bleed. 

Renewed lost relationships, for His grace dripped from every heart. I was given a brand new start. Clarity, and beauty in this life, only because He loves me just that much! Grace oozes from within my skin, and may you too know this grace I speak of. 

Swaddled like a baby in new birth, grace wraps me tightly and keeps me perched. I soar with what used to be very broken wings. If you listen you can even hear me sing, way above the tree tops. I can’t be stopped! New life. 

He heard my plea, on bended knee.

Word Prompt: Carousel 

Phillipians 4:13

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me

I choose to swim…

Been going through a lot, my heart still bares threads. Torn to shreds. I start over yet, AGAIN!
I am not poor

I am not shabby

Jesus is my caddy

I am not inferior, or low quality

Jesus is superior

I can’t change the status of my life, I have a new name. Scratch wife

I am not subpar

I am not second rate

Jesus is written on my hearts slate

So when you look at my page, and see I am now Lisa M. O’Day, all is okay

I am back to write, because I know no matter the goings on in my life I am not substandard

I will rise above yet another test that God has given me, my plea is that I swim and not sink 

Hey I know I am not too shabby, just another journey to walk. Not just talk

A new road road now unfolds, imperfect yep. God makes up the difference, substandard not with Jesus as my right hand man. For with Him I will stand

Time to swim, catch my breath. Tread the water I used to sink

Watch me take flight, as Eagles soar for Jesus I adore through all the tribulations. This will not get under my skin. Sink or Swim. 

I choose swim until the very end…  

Word Prompt: Substandard

Firmly rooted, I will not ebb

My feet sink deep into your earth, firmly taking root. Soil bed I lay, nurtured there

The ground kept watered generously, waiting to unveil life blossoms within me

From a shoot to a flower in full bloom. Vibrant in color, a kindergarteners best kept crayon

Fertilized, and nursed to keep disease at bay. New growth daily

Fervent I grow, and fervent He keeps me. The soil that swaddles my new growth keeps my leaves from withering 

Storms pass, and winds blow. Wanting to steal my beauty, make my leaves cower

Soiled in the the seed it is now permiated into my roots, giving me the boost to keep growing

I will not wither, fade, or ebb. I shall stand tall within my root bed allowing to be fed, and fostered

For I am firmly rooted, soils bed has fertilized my core. Beyond any compare

Peace in the watered bed of soil I lay today, and everyday. May the storm pass fast, leaves not dwindle

Flourish not flounder in my pot of life, where I have taken on life. Vibrant no matter the weather’s climate 

Word Prompt: Soil

Tailor made love of that in Him…swim!!

I have not posted for a couple days. Not my per usual self. God kinda put this glaring yellow flashing yeild sign up in my life. Ugh (sigh). Yep that kind of a pressing matter.

 4 years to the day since landing in Spokane after the fall out of what was my life of 21 years, God says here ya go Lisa. So for my readers I am still here. Just on my face in prayer, sorting, sifting, and processing my new found revelations. 

So when I saw the prompt today was tailor. All I could think of was God, and my relationship with Him. How perfectly tailored it is to me. So specific in every regard. He knows me better than I know myself. There is no greater love known to man than that of my tailor made love of that of Jesus. His love fits me like a glove. We are the perfect square of a Rubik’s Cube, and all the colors match up always. 

He brings these storm surges in my life, and says here ya go Lisa. Sink or swim. I am your life line, we can walk on these waters hand in hand. So I stand up tall with my new found heavy heart, and I will see it through with my tailor made perfect love of that of Jesus. He will help me walk brave, tall, and not cower in despair. 

So I am still here. Just got lots of sorting to do. God is making me a beautifully tailored outfit as I am writing to slip into for today. How great a love is that in Him. The one that taught me how to live sober, and swim. He took my very broken wings, and gave me flight. One is a tad bent, but not beyond repair. For I am strong in Him. I need to go now, got to swim…

Blessings WP friends. God is greater than all of this. 

Word Prompt: Tailor  

Perseverance as your friend, and courage as your shoes, Brand New you

It is the perseverance that you carry, and the smile that you wear. Your heart of gold. You are bold beyond your years

You got up with all you could muster, life had sucked you dry. No tears left to cry. Tired of handing over all of your paychecks with not even a bed to lay your weary hard working bones. No food to keep you fed

You walked out the door, shut the door tight. No key leaving the chaotic ruins behind. Never looked back, as your heart had already took quite a beating. You were always on the back burner, you turned inward words were missed. Personality unknown to them in your home

Clothed in courage you drove miles in change of your life. Yours is an uphill climb. Nothing has come easy. You walk a step behind, but yet you still dig your toes in and begin

You have true grit, and dreams to unfold. Perseverance in your pockets, and a locket of courage around your neck. Watching you change I am truly amazed at your want for only healthy in your life

You are witty, charming, and sarcastic no doubt. I believe in you, as I have seen your once crushed spirit strutting its new self. Showing a real smile from ear to ear, here and there

Yep even through the sarcasm as your mom I see it shine, and you my son are mine. You have true grit. You got up, with perseverance as your friend, and courage as your new shoes. You have made a life brand new. Most could not will to do

Finding yourself, and who you are. Looking past the scars of your your youth. Not playing the victim. Like a cowboy takes the reigns of his horse headed for his course. You too took reign of your life. True grit

I am proud of you, and God has you! Look up, and you shall see the courage comes from above, and He is there. Your life is in the making. It is yours for the taking. God is giving you freedoms pass. True grit in all you do. Perseverance, and free at last. God is rewriting your life. In Him take take up refuge. Never be weary for a place to lay your head again 

He will give you billows of peace as you continue on. I see your smile, you can’t fool me. It is the darn cutest thing I ever have seen. Makes your mama’s heart sing

True grit..I see in you Elias my son. Best birthday you have had in years. Laughter, and sarcasm bringing tears. 19, and you stood up stood and your ground and never turned back around…Blew out your candles. Pray you get your wish, as you blew life brand new

Your whole life is in front of you, True Grit in God will carry you through

Word Prompt: Grit 

Beauty and the beast, beast and the beauty… 

Beauty and the beast, beast and the beauty. Truly a miraculous story, and God gets all the Glory!  

Bloodthirtsy out to soak my skin caverness deep with alcolohics rage body numbing, and dumb to no end

The monster in me unleashed with each sip, turning green with anger I pour more making sure every one knows my wrath, savage bent

Needed not wanted oozing from within, my tongue dripping with lies my eyes hidden with my mask of flask. Camouflaged with the bottle

My tears not pure, just self loathe. Coated from head to toe toxic blow. My liver hurt. Yet my heart was dead. Feed me more, even the score

Sadistic creating my own self demise. Twisted and calculated my breath lost respect with every word spoken. I was blind, deaf, and dumb

Wake for the sake of alcohols pour, wanting to end my suffering. Just a buffer to make it through the days. Yet my own shaky hand held the knife. Shed my blood of my own self pity. Dripping with hate

Savage I am no more. God woke me from my drunken quake. He directed me to lit path of truth. He washed me in a grace filled basin. Splashes of grace, mercy, and love. Dunked me until all the filth washed clear, and I could look within a mirror

Beast turned to beauty. Savage to warmth. God saved my ravenous poisoned soul. Made me ravenous for harvest plentiful in only Him. Had me drinking of the holy water, and called me into him as His daughter

Saved from savage, put down my knife. Broke the bottle, and my spirit poured out new

Beauty and the beast. Beast and the beauty. Truly a miraculous story…

Word Prompt: Savage